I get asked numerous questions on a weekly basis all related to ex boyfriends and the difficulties in getting back together. Each scenario is unique as are all the people involved but I thought it would be helpful to share some of the questions here along with my answers. If you have your own question please use the comment section and I’ll respond as quickly as I can. Remember – he’s your guy – you love him, don’t give up.
If you want to read more about tools to help get him back, this will help.
Question for January 14th, 2014
Question: My ex boyfriend and I are still friends on Facebook. It drives me nuts how he’s always posting happy stuff and saying he’s hanging out with lots of people (hot girls included.) We still message each other and he sometimes likes my posts. I want him back! Do I unfriend him or just ignore him or keep commenting on his wall? Help!
My response: Facebook is not your ally when it comes to getting back the man you adore. It’s more of a foe and here’s why. No good is going to come out of watching your ex boyfriend happily move on with his life. You’re going to feel jealous, depressed, nervous and anxious. There isn’t a filter on what most of us post on Facebook. That’s especially true if you know your ex is watching your every move. You have no clue whether your ex boyfriend is genuinely enjoying himself or whether he’s using Facebook as a tool of manipulation to get you to come back to him. My best advice it to disengage in any friendship on Facebook with him. In other words, defriend him today. This is going to help you in two ways. First, it’s going to ensure you aren’t checking his status updates constantly. Secondly, it sends him a very clear message that you’re not interested in what he’s up to. This may seem cold but it actually can help you get him back. If he thinks you genuinely aren’t going to participate in his Facebook drama, he’s going to worry that you’ve moved on. If he happens to ask you why you two aren’t friends on the social site anymore, just comment that you were cleaning up your friend’s list. Don’t offer more than that. There’s no reason to.